30 days of potty training (and counting)

They say that if you start potty training too early, you'll just be doing it longer. We are a living testament to this truth.

Now, we didn't know if Riley was ready or not, but we did give it our best shot. We went cold-turkey -- no diapers, just undies and trainers. Our boy feels wet and dirty each time he has an accident, so if he doesn't like it he'll be motivated to keep that from happening next time. However, if he's not able to sense his need to go ahead of time, communicate to us that he needs to go, all the while possessing the muscle control to keep from going until situated on the potty -- well, motivation alone may not be enough to complete the training process.

We could just put him back in diapers and revisit this again in May when he turns three. We don't see any problem with that, especially with Kendall arriving in the next 10 weeks or so. Also, I found out it's against the law in Massachusetts to deny a child entry into preschool for not being potty trained. So the pressure's off there too.

After talking about it, we decided to keep doing what we've been doing (See previous PT post here), but allow ourselves the flexibility to put him in diapers overnight as well as when we're out of the house when it would be a royal pain to deal with messy pants. This is what we did when we went snowshoeing last Saturday. The facilities were entirely inadequate for potty training and it was a relief to give ourselves the diaper option and not have to worry about it for a few hours.

So... Riley continues to practice the lifestyle of sitting on the potty at regular intervals, but we're not having to clean up messes from the carpet or wash his sheets 3x per week anymore. Seems to be a workable solution in the interim until all the major life changes of the next several months have passed and he's developmentally further along.

Several lessons we've learned from this experience are:

1) This is a milestone that each child reaches in their own time. It's not a contest. It's not a sign of high intelligence or good parenting skills if a child happens to achieve it on the early side. Kids excel at some things and lag behind in others, just like parents. Right now, Riley is more into the alphabet and spelling words than potty training. Fine by us.

2) A child is truly potty trained when they can sense the urge to go and either communicate the need for help to the potty or get to the potty and hold their bladder & bowel muscles until seated. Putting a child at regular intervals has the parent trained, but not the child. This is the parent directing the process, so the child really isn't trained yet. (It's good practice, however!)

3) If someone tells you that their method works for all kids, regardless of temperament, personality or developmental maturity -- they're trying to Sell You Something. My laid-back, under-no-peer-pressure son is quite content to keep the status quo for now, despite our making him feel uncomfortable in his soiled undies and reminding him how to avoid it next time.

4) Lastly, no child gets on the bus in diapers (or so I've heard).

Rest assured, this is the final potty training update from our family... until it's done, of course!

In other news... we registered Riley for preschool starting in July. My baby boy is growing up! He'll be attending a preschool here in town that's run by a Christian who infuses prayer, Bible stories and Christian principles into the educational process. Early Intervention had great things to say about this school as well as other parents I've met here in town. When I took the tour back in 2008, I was very impressed with their program. So we're pretty excited to see Riley take advantage of the learning opportunities that he'll have there.

Shelby