The Gospel and the CTP

I’m still trying to get my mind around the reality of no more 15 hours of study every weekend. Ever. Again. I can now add CTP to my professional signature, indicating that I’ve learned a little something about corporate treasury and finance. It was not an easy test – I’m glad I put the time into studying that I did. But I never want to do THAT again. I need my family time…badly.

This has been another opportunity to apply the gospel to my everyday life. Here I have been struggling with fear and anxiety about this exam, feeling like so much was riding on it, and not able to hope that I’d pass, for fear that the disappointment of failure would be devastating. In typical fashion, I try and brace myself for the worst and then feel relieved when it turns out better than that. Deep down, I know I’ve not been good and assume that my Father doesn’t want to help me. It’s silly really, since He let His beloved son be slaughtered for my sake and tells me that if he hasn’t spared his own son, why wouldn’t he freely give me all things?? So, for the umpteenth time, I prayed for help with my unbelief – that the truth of the gospel would sink further into my soul.

As I was reading the Bible yesterday, I was reminded that God wants us to put our full trust in him. This nonsense about God helping those that help themselves is not found anywhere in Scripture. In fact, I see that God wants me to rely on Him rather than in myself so he can glorify Himself by doing the impossible and improbable. I know that there were questions on the exam that I had to take my best educated guess on and some of those were answered correctly because Someone gave me insight. So, let me give credit where it’s due – yes, I did study, and yes, I’m not stupid, but no way did I pass solely on the strength of my abilities. I had divine help and those of you who also know my Father, I'm sure He got a lot of pleasure out of answering your prayers of my behalf (and I was grateful for those prayers!).

In celebration of this wonderful day, my son and I went out for sushi this afternoon:















Now, time for bed and a good night’s sleep with no more monkey on my back,

Shelby